Friday, August 29, 2008

Do you know, all my friends are coupled up? That’s right, every good friend I have is happily involved with a lovely boy. Some are living with said boy, some are even engaged. I dread and delight in equal parts the first marriage.


I will never be that girl. I am destined to be Anna all alone all my life. There is nothing that can be done to change that (I’ve heard the ‘you just wait for the right guy’ line a million times – it’s rubbish) and I just have to learn to live with it. It hurts. Truly, deeply, absolutely, it hurts. I want to be loved, but I except that true love can not be everyone’s fate. Some of us have to learn to be happy alone. I am finding that very hard. I am thoroughly pissed off that all the rest of my friends have fun – I don’t even have that. I am just ignored, alone and unloved


I know, I am wallowing. But sometimes I just have to, to keep some semblance of sanity. I wish there was a palpable reason for my lot in life, something I could put my finger on, that I could change, Sadly, there just bloodly isn’ t. It’s one of those things you just have to live with. You know, I’m blonde, blue eyed, artistic, alone. Just part of my character, something that will last til the end.


And everytime it breaks my heart again. I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to that.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

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Marysienka said...

Same story here...
*cries under her pillow*

Dragonfly said...

I suspect (based on 20+ years of experience) that I also am a loner and destined to remain so (until I get a cat at least). *Hugs and feels your pain*

Anna said...

we should get together with a bottle of wine and some chocolate. it's the only substitute we have...

Dragonfly said...

Hehe.

Sage said...

Never say never.. I did last year thinking that I would be alone for the rest of my life and accepted it with good grace. Then met someone who yesterday proposed to me, still can't quite believe it. So moral is that you never know what is around the corner.

Alessandro Simonelli said...

For some reason I am now playing kings of leon use somebody, i'm a guy and although were are loath to admit it, we often feel the same...

Tor Hershman said...

Lionel Milo Nance, 81, was arrested and booked into Davis County Jail on a warrant for sexually assaulting a child.

Nance was booked into the jail Thursday morning on suspicion of committing three counts of rape of a child, the aggravated sexual abuse of a child and one count of sodomy upon a child.

The 2nd District Court in Farmington, Utah had issued warrants for his arrest on the three rape counts on Tuesday on behalf of the Syracuse Police Department. According to court documents, the offenses occurred on March 26, 1995. His bail is set at more than $400,000.